Tag Archives: behavior problems

Mama Mia! 10 Ways To Manage Parents!

Uncategorised, , , , , , , , ,

As a music teacher, you’re not just teaching children to play; sometimes you’re teaching parents to play nice! Some parents may be overly involved during class; some may not engage at all. Some parents will push their child too hard; others won’t practice a note after class. Some may have unrealistic expectations of you, the curriculum, or their child’s ability or progress. They may be critical of your teaching methods, the class schedule, or your payment policy. Bottom line – at some point in your Musikgarten teaching career you will come across an unpleased parent. But there are things you can do to prevent and smooth over issues before they get out of hand. After all, parents are your customers and you want to keep them coming back!

Here are a few smart ways to manage moms n’ dads, and keep your Musikgarten humming along in perfect harmony.

  1. Set Expectations Early! Discuss what is expected of parents, students, yourself and your staff. Provide written guidelines, a poster in your studio, or some type of expectations “contract.” Keep rules and consequences clear and concise. For example, how will you handle late payments? No payments? No-shows? Behavior issues? Iron it out now, before you’re put in a tough spot later.
  1. Communicate How To Communicate! Let parents know the best time(s) and preferred way(s) to contact you in person, via email and on the phone. Don’t feel obligated to give out your personal or cell phone number or to answer calls during dinner. If a parent wants your attention between busy back-to-back classes, let them know a better time to chat.
  1. Listen Up! Active listening is critical, especially if there’s a problem. Make eye contact, repeat what you’re hearing and ask for clarification where needed. Make sure you understand the issue before diving in with a solution. Even if a parent is voicing a complaint, wait until they finish to respond. The parent will feel respected and heard, they won’t feel the need to repeat it, and you’ll know the whole argument before you reply.
  1. No Time Like Now! Don’t let little things fester. Address a problem as soon as it arises and nip it in the bud. Encourage parents to voice their concerns promptly, too.

“One of the best tools in my tool box is a studio policy with very clear expectations for students and parents. I also try to keep the lines of communications open. I touch base with parents frequently through email, or one on one. That way we can nip problems in the bud before they become out of control. I have found that the majority of my families are respectful if you are clear about what you want.”  -Paulette Amory, Early Childhood Music School

  1. Do The Math. If you have a problem with one parent, address that parent one-on-one. If you’re having the same problem with many parents (e.g. lots of families in the habit of arriving late or lingering too long after class), then address it as a group or in an email as a “friendly reminder.”
  1. Focus On Facts, Not Feelings. Having a heated discussion? Keep personal feelings out of it. Focus on the facts (“Your payments are consistently late…”) and the impact of those (“So I am not able to pay my staff promptly.”) but not personal feelings (“I feel like you’re taking advantage of me!”). If the problem is with a child’s behavior, focus on the behavior and the impact of that behavior. Then involve mom and dad in the solution. For example, “I had to remind Parker to stop throwing instruments five times today. It’s disruptive to the rest of the class and I know it’s not fun for Parker. How can we work together to help him?”
  1. Follow Up, Fast! Document important conversations and solutions immediately in an email to the parent. Then, if the solution seems to be working, let the parent know and thank them so they know you’re paying attention. If the problem continues, you’ll have a handy record of your attempts to remedy – especially important in the case of payment or behavior issues.
  1. Be Consistent! Don’t play favorites or give preferential treatment such as discounts or allowing disruptive behavior to go unchecked. Even if close friends or family join your class, treat everyone equally.
  1. Anticipate Conflicts. Don’t be surprised – or take it personally – when a parent isn’t happy about something. As the saying goes, you can’t please 100% of the people, 100% of the time. All you can do is listen empathetically and respond with respect and professionalism. So be kind as kind to yourself as you are to your customers!
  1. Ask For Feedback. Once a quarter, ask parents to provide specific, constructive feedback about you and your studio either in the form of a free survey or email. This shows parents that you truly care about their opinions and gives them the opportunity to be heard.

Tell us teachers, how do you manage parents? Share your questions, thoughts, ideas, and advice with us here.

Big, Bad Behavior Problems Solved! Top Tips from Musikgarten Teachers – Part 1 of 2

Uncategorised, , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

What are your biggest behavior challenges? Fidgety kids? Disruptive outbursts? Parents who seem oblivious to their child’s charming antics?

Last month, we asked Musikgarten teachers for their best advice on classroom management and dealing with disruptive behaviors. The number of responses was overwhelming, so we’ll tackle this topic as a two-part series. This month, we’ll address behavior issues; next month we’ll cover clever classroom management methods.

Let’s talk behavior problems! When it comes to behavior, it’s not that kids are either good or bad. All children act up from time-to-time, some more than others. It helps to understand why kids act out:

  • They’re tired or hungry
  • They’re not used to participating in structured or group activities and don’t know “the rules” yet
  • They’re shy, nervous, or feeling insecure
  • They want attention
  • They’re not ready for a class just yet; children mature at different rates
  • They may have a special needs, such as autism, ADHD, or a behavioral, neurological or sensory processing disorder

IMG_6021

Remember, it’s your studio, your rules, and a little structure goes a long way toward making sure parents and children have the best experience possible.

A few Do’s and Don’ts when it comes to behavior issues:

  • Do let families know your class expectations from day one. Hang a poster. Post class rules on your website. Remind children often or ask them to remind you of the rules.
  • Do address severe or ongoing behavior problems promptly and privately with the child’s parent after class. The longer you let a problem persist, the tougher it will be to correct.
  • Do let parents know you want to work with them to help their child have the best experience and get the most from your class

 “Parent cooperation only comes out of good relationships with the families you serve. Good working relationships, where the people know that you care, are the first step in handling any misbehavior.” – Robin Bishop, HappyHeart Musikgarten

  • Don’t ask if, imply or suggest a child has special needs such as ADHD or autism – those are specific medical diagnoses that should only be made by qualified professionals.
  • Do reward good behavior openly and often. Let other children set an example.
  • Do politely ask a parent to temporarily remove an unruly child to help them calm down.
  • Do try to understand why a child may be acting up and work with parents to find a solution. If a child is always cranky during a mid-morning class, he may just need a nap at that time and a later class.

 Now, some tips from real Musikgarten teachers!

  1. Great Behavior Begins with Mom & Dad! “It all begins with parent education. At the very first class of each semester, I go over what parents can expect from their child and how I would like the parents to participate. I want the parents to model what I do, and the children will learn from them. I tell parents all children participate differently in class: some will just watch, some will be active elsewhere in the room, etc. I continually remind parents of these ideas through out the semester.” – Jennifer Anderson, Music Time Studio
  1. Call on Mom or Dad. If a child starts crying, screaming, or melting down during a class, take a note from Kendra Beagles of KB’s Musik and address it directly to the parent. She’ll politely say, “You’re welcome to take Suzy to the bathroom if she needs a break. Please come back and join us as soon as she’s calm.” Make sure the parent knows you’re encouraging a brief cool down for the child, not asking them to leave.
  1. Use Body Language. No child likes to be reprimanded in front of a class. And as a teacher, you don’t want to interrupt a song or dance. Try this: Stand up and deliberately position yourself next to the child or in between the children being disruptive. “By moving yourself and continuing the song, you show them that you’re not going to let their behavior interrupt the activity that the others are enjoying.” – Shannon May, Apple Tree Arts 
  1. Stop Disruptions Before They Start.  “My studio is as free from distractions as possible. There is nothing for the kids to get into. There are very few “no’s” in my studio.  I save “no” for when something is a danger to the child or someone else (e.g. hitting or throwing instruments).” – Jennifer Anderson, Music Time Studio
  1. Call Out Good Recognize children who are following directions with verbal praise and positive attention. Say, “I really like how Mason and Ella and Audrey are sitting in the circle. Who else can sit in the circle? Good!”
  1. Redirect Unwanted Attention. Use the child’s name and clearly remind, invite, and encourage him or her toward the positive and desired behavior. Offer praise when they follow directions. For example, “Claire, we need you over here to help us sing this song. Thank you!” or “Jacob, show us how you make circles with the scarves. That’s right! Who else can make circles like Jacob?”
  1. Teach Children to Respect Instruments. We love this input from Kendra Beagles, because it incorporates three important behavior management concepts: 1) Set expectations 2) Follow though with consequences 3) Positively reinforce the desired behavior. “Set children up for success before passing out instruments so they know how to treat them with care. Before I pass out rhythm sticks, I announce ‘Who can tell me what happens if you throw your sticks?’ The children reply, ‘Mrs. B gets them!’ If a child does throw the sticks, I immediately go pick up the sticks and say ‘Wow! I have more sticks to play with now!’ I then place the sticks on the floor behind my back. This lets children know I mean what I say and will follow through with my actions. The child will usually pout or cry, but I continue with my class activity. After a few minutes I’ll motion for the child to come get his/her sticks. If they throw them again, I take them and don’t give them back. At the end of class I’ll go over to the child and let them know that I enjoy having them in my music class and am very pleased when they respect my instruments.” – Kendra Beagles, KB’s Musik
  1. Offer Simple Choices. Very young children have a difficult time with open-ended questions such as “Where do you want to sit?” or “What should you do?” This can frustrate them and exacerbate the disruption. Instead, give them a very simple either/or option. For example, to let a child know running around is not an option, you can ask, “Do you want to sit on Mommy’s lap or mine?” or “You may join us in the circle or sit over there.” – tip courtesy of Jane Burlinson, Coastal School of Music 

Wait, there’s more! Stay tuned for Part 2 next month, where we share teachers’ top classroom management tips to keep things running smoothly (even large classes).

Thank you to our awesome contributing teachers for their time, talent, and wisdom!

What do you think? Share your questions, thoughts, ideas, and advice with us here.